Sunday, October 12, 2008

Starting All Over Again

No such thing as coincidence: I'm listening to "Starting All Over Again" (the original by Mel and Tim). I don't really subscribe to the drama and "effort" promoted by the lyrics, but the "starting over" part seems to be the theme of my last few days - starting over anew, on a fresh page, unencumbered by the past, that is. This last week has been filled with rediscovery of the wonder of the familiar, beholding Him making all things new (Revelations 21:1-5).

It all began when I took on something I thought I'd never be taking on again - accepting an accountability, in Landmark Education, I used to believe I'd "outgrown" (been there, done that, etc.) That opened up a space for me to take on other things in my life that I'd either given up on, set aside, or had been postponing for "someday, not now."

After 20 years, I'll be singing again onstage for the 25th year celebration of a college production that's grown to epic proportions since our days at the University of the Philippines. I'd relegated myself as a mere spectator and cheerleader after graduation, and I always thought I'd be satisfied back "in the stands." But I found myself stepping up once again, with that good old college performance experience mno longer just filed away in memory but made real. At least this time around, I can stay up at rehearsals without incurring the wrath of the parental units. Heh heh.

Also, after almost a decade of keeping to the sidelines, I've found myself back in the arms of my first love as a lawyer: litigation. Now that I've taken that on again fully, I get what I loved so much about it in the first place: the challenge of preparation and research, the gambit and strategic foresight, the intellectual stimulation and thinking on one's feet. It's what I'm best at, and I now can't even remember why I ever gave it up in the first place!

I'm also back in a personal "game" that I'll share about later - suffice it to say that I'd been in the "gallery" with respect to that area of my life for a good year or so. I didn't want to risk or confront anything that could lead to slightest hint of failure...but that's in the foreground again, and I'm playing full-out, on the court, from here on. Ha, as they say, intentions count for nothing; actions determine the outcome! I've also found that saying "yes" and giving my commitment, without having to think too long and hard about it ("Just do it!"), has opened up so much, so quickly - once I've given my word to something, the question of how I'm going to fulfill on it and make everything else work out becomes - for lack of a better term - incidental, and the challenge is transformed from "daunting" to "exciting."

In other areas, I've also rediscovered my love for cooking as an expression of my love for the people in my life, reestablished my connection with 70's soul music, reconnected with those most important to me, and rekindled old flames that I thought had gone out. Wink, wink.

I've found - and am continuing to find - adventure and newness in the familiar, and I'm loving it. I may be exploring "old" waters, but this time, with a beginner's mind - through which anything is possible. For indeed, I CAN do ALL things through Him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13) :-)

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