Complete

Yesterday, Sunday, was the final full day of the most recent Landmark Forum in Manila. Participants got THE conversation of the LF, the big kabaaaaammm! that ties it all together.

I had a little breakdown in my schedule early in the morning, so I missed Father Gregg Banaga's Mass for the participants and the assistants. I always love when either Father Gregg (President of Adamson University, and a former Introduction Leader of the LF) or Father Elis of the Salesian order celebrate Sunday Mass; they bring the distinctions of transformation so beautifully into the conversation of Christianity and the Church.

But anyway. As I'd missed the morning Mass, I went to the noon Mass at Sta. Maria della Strada instead, with the intention to have a revelation in my faith. And I did.

It wasn't earth-shaking or mind-blowing; rather, it came, as God often speaks, in a quiet whisper during consecration.

The Lord sees us with the eyes of a Creator who gave up His only Son so that our sins may be forgiven. He looks upon us not with revulsion or derision for our imperfections, but as the redeemed: unblemished, pristine, and as perfect as He created us in the beginning. For while we initially fell from grace, we, in His great plan, have all been cleansed by the blood of the Lamb.

Strangely enough, we are frequently less forgiving of ourselves than the Great Forgiver Himself. We oftentimes beat ourselves up, emotionally and spiritually, without regard to how He took the fall for our transgressions, and how He suffered and died so that we wouldn't have to. We get stuck in a world of making ourselves (and others) wrong, worrying about how our lives are going, figuring out where we've lost our way, without regard for what His passion and cross were all about.

And here is what I got: He, once and for all, on that dark afternoon on Calvary, healed our brokenness. He got us back to where we were as He intended us: whole, perfect, and complete. And for what? So we could be HIM in the world, to continue what He began - to have OTHERS recognize who they are in His eyes. Whole, perfect, and complete.

Yet when we "indulge" in our brokenness, when we dwell too long in "what's wrong with me?" or "why are things not going the way they should?," or "what does He really want me to do?" we are useless to Him and His plan. Our brokenness, blessed as it may be, keeps us from being there for OTHERS - from being there for and being Him to the flock He has entrusted us to tend. Our world becomes all about us as our individual selves, and not about Him - He who is in our neighbors and in the world as He is in us. Ironically, it is, the giving of ourselves to others - the outpouring of who and what He has blessed us with - that has us have the experience of being COMPLETE.

I am reminded of my earthly hero, Mother Teresa, and her dark night of the soul, which lasted for decades. Despite her inner turmoil, she gave of herself to the world, without shutting herself out or retreating from what she was called to do. And the Lord's work was done through her, and continues to be done, many years after her death. She touched, healed, and comforted countless lives without succumbing to the temptation to withdraw, fix, or figure it out before moving along.

We are, indeed, jars of clay that contain a great Treasure. While we are easily broken, through every crack and shard the magnificence that is within shines through. Our job is not to patch up the pieces and keep the container intact. Our mission is to break ourselves open, completely, so that the glorious Presence within finally, and perfectly, is released to illuminate all the world with His Light.

Amen.